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The Truth About the Holidays: Their Real Stories
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My Page is the Start of a Revolution Against Holidays Gone Bad.
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Hello. My Name is Becca and I have to share with you what I have learned. Sadly, over the course of time, I discovered that some of the most beloved and wonderful holidays are in fact evil and some wanted criminals. This page is for truth seekers only and is highly recommended for those who have been deceived by holidays. Please e-mail me if you have any information on some other holidays.
Picture: Do you really think that bunny is holding eggs? Well your wrong, those are hand made bombs which are decorated as eggs and made in a German Factory. Then, they sent to very important people who are wanted " out of the way." As you can see the Easter Bunny is evil.
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Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny: Lovers or Killers?
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These are two stories from our vault. These are the stories of Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny and how they went from fun loving holidays to gut renching heathens which live by evil stadards.
Case #4532GH0443A
Santa Clause:
Santa, a beloved and cherished man who represented a holiday which showed true love and joy, went from good to evil with the flip of a switch. Santa was watching his robots build the toys for the little boys and girls one evening when 4 young men, who we can not identify, came and told Santa how he could double production and save costs. After a long talk with the young men Santa caved in. The idea was simple, or so they said. Santa had to sign a contract making the 5 of them partners. Then man #1 would make a few calls, man #2 would rent some U-haul trucks while man #4 and #3 took a flight to Indonesia. Then 4 and 3 would pick up the shipment of sweat shop workers which ranged in ages from 5 to 8 (reason being so they would have a more elf like apearance.) 5 months later Mrs. Clause found out and divorced Santa, threating to tell the world about this scandal. Mrs. Clause managed to call my agency and tell us the story, but now we can not get a hold of her and no one has seen her for 3 weeks. If you have any information on who the young men may be, where Mrs. Clause may be, or anything on this scandal please e-mail me.
Picutre: This picture was taken a few minutes after Santa and some of his partners had gotten a shipment of new "elves" and had sold some bad "elves."
People in photo: Bottom row- Man #1, Santa, Man #4. Top row- Man #2 and Man #3.
Case #5039DK2948W
The Easter Bunny:
Many of us have heard the story of Peter Cottontail and the Easter Bunny. These stories where told to many children and of course they believed them. But what if I told you that they weren't true? Not one word could be backed up with proof or that no over the age of 320 had ever heard of these fictitious rabbits?
Well get ready, because the truth is here. E.A. Bunny was a rabbit who was born and raised in Norway. Long about the time he was 9, he was being trained on how to fight and be a spy for agency. WWI came along and E.A.'s brother, Peter Cortensail Bunny, his father Harvey R. Bunny, and his sister Lila M. Bunny served in the German Army. E.A. would have but his father and mother agreed he was to little. 7 months later, he found out that his family had died. 1 week later his mother killed herself and urged E.A. to do so as well. He declined. He swore to his (dead)family that he would serve in the German Army and be the most feared bunny in the world. When WWII broke out he had his chance. He fought in the war and was promoted till he made it to general, but he stil wasn't happy. He worked his tail off and got to meet Adolf Hitler one day. Adolf liked what he saw and just like that he was Adolf's personal assistant. Just when Germany thought she was winning, she lost. Now some say that Hitler and his girlfriend killed themselves in his bunker. We have reason to believe it was E.A. and Hitler. Some say Bunny's dying words were, "See mom, one way or another, I always do what you tell me to."
No one is quite sure how he became the Easter Bunny. Some say it started in Germany and just came to the United States. No one is really sure. If you have any information, e-mail me.
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St. Patrick: Saint or Sick-o?
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Case #9847AR3197G
John Patrick Martin:
On a sunny day in Cuba about 4,000 years ago, a young boy named John Patrick Martin was born. He grew up in Cuba and followed her in her Communist ways. Everyone liked John except he had a few things about him NO ONE liked. He was a independent person, very strong willed, and everything turned into a fight with him. He also never seemed to age over the age of 50. Some believe it might have been the spell the witch doctor placed on him when he was born. By the time he was 3,091 he had been driven into war and had blood on his mind. He was a general in the Cuban Army and had killed many men, more than any other man. Then about 1975, John met a man named Fidel Castro in a parking lot of a Yappy's 10% Food Mart. The two became fast friends. When Fidel became dictator, John was one of his advisors. Fidel trusted John with his life and the same applied to John. Fidel became curious why when John told him of his life why he left out about 1,000 years? John explained to him that he had escaped to Ireland during a war. He would have come back sooner but the people tempted him to stay with gallons of beer. They had even labeled him St. Patrick, seeing is how they had a St. John already. During the Cuban Missile Crisis, John sold Fidel out by giving the US classified secrets and plans. Fidel has told certain people that when he finds John he will have his head. My agency is dying to find him and talk to him. Some say he went back to Ireland and has settled down as a Miguel Clayborne. If you have any information PLEASE E-MAIL ME!
Picture: This picture was drawn by a small Cuban child who said the man in the picture was a good friend of Fidel Castro. He even cut and died his beard to match Fidel's! Later, we found out that the man in the illustration was a Cuban named John Patrick Martin, a.k.a. St. Patrick.
Please visit our sister page for more incriminating stories about the holidays which is at 500 Dead Parrot Dr., Benny Hills. I am working on it but it won't be to long before it's up and running!!!
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